12/12 Portal

I don’t know about you, but I am FEELING the energies of this portal like it’s nobody’s business, electrified with possibility and the zap of “DO ALL THE DAMN THINGS.” This year is going to be a radical time period of stepping into our power and living up to the very tip tops of our highest, most aligned selves- for those who have been doing the extreme inner work over these months, years and decade (some have been at it even longer… thank you for your wonderful work!!).

On the other hand, this time period will continue to be a jarring SHAKE AND WAKE to those who have yet to experience their awakenings, those straight up not doing that deep mirror work (check out my previous post Mirrors if you want to go deeper into that), those needing to continue to move through some dark nights of the soul (initiations 🔥) , or those who generally still need to work through some big soul lessons. It’s all in the name of self-mastery, and we’re moving through this at our own pace (be gentle with yourselves beautiful healers- it’s all perfectly orchestrated with your highest good in mind!).

{{Side note: If you are feeling stuck and want some help moving through the layers, HMU for a session!}}✨🦋✨

If you’ve been polishing up your internal worlds, dreaming beautiful dreams and deep cleaning to let go of all the baggage you once carried, prepare to feel in flow- flight comes to mind. It’s a time period to feel what these wings are really made of if you’re ready for it. These incoming energies hold an influentially gorgeous breeze if you’re ready to take the leap and let yourself soar. If you are, go ahead and hitch a ride with this high vibe timeline.

As we do this, keep in mind that it’s our state of mind that determines the quality of our experiences. The more centered we can remain through any situation, the more we’ll get out of what comes to us. Often, people turn totally fine circumstances into something dramatic and uncomfortable. It’s overall unnecessary, but to maintain a calm and centered demeanor takes time and dedication. It’s our commitment to inner stillness and living within our heart space that eventually leads us to stepping into greater forms of mastery.

It IS possible. It is NOT easy at first. It WILL require working mental/physical/spiritual muscles we’re not often taught to use. But eventually a new way of being begins to make itself known- first in small doses, then in more frequent visits, and it continues like this until it becomes our predominate state of being. On the other hand, when we go through an “awakening” or what some might term a “kundalini awakening,” we’re initially FLOODED with this state of being- and then it leaves us so we can do some house keeping- ya know, the deep trauma work, ancestral/karmic healing, etc. We have to seriously put in the work to tap back into that state of mind, but eventually if we’re consistent we get there with more a greater ease. It’s a magical, yet at times jarring, journey.

I’m finally seeing some of these results playing out in my own life after 12 years (HOLY COW. I went through my awakening 12 years ago! What a mind trip) of the crazy journey that has ensued since that initial time period where people thought I lost my mind. Really, that’s what happens though; you lose the mental structures that were once in place that helped you to determine reality and then do the deep inner searching to try and remember what reality even is (at least that’s part of it).

For this past week especially, I have been living in a state of pure love, and seeing myself responding in ways that even some months ago I wouldn’t have had access to. To highlight this, yesterday I wanted to stop into a nearby Fred Meyer’s on my way home, but missed my turn. It felt odd- Why didn’t I turn there? At that moment though I held so much gratitude in my heart and thought, “well there must be a reason I’m going this way.” Over and over I continued to think “I’m so thankful to be alive. I’m so thankful for my life.” I found myself taking a random street south and wondered what was awaiting me because I could just feel something (wonderful? I don’t know if that was quite the feeling) was going to happen.

I drove into the intersection of a four way and noticed the guy to my right wasn’t about to stop. Immediately I sped up, quickly trying to steer to the left and get out of his way, but it was too late. He slammed into us, sending the car, my dog and I spinning around multiple times until we landed solidly in between a pole and a street sign.

My first thought was if my dog was okay, because she was sitting about where we were hit. She was frantic and in shock and immediately tried to jump out the window and run away (and did- I had to chase her down). Neighbors gathered and I could hear them in unison bitching about the city not putting a stop sign in. Even in the midst of all this commotion, I felt grounded and had a general sense of awe for the moment.

Somehow, other than Sherp’s shock and the pretty good damage to the car, we made it out totally okay, with not even a sore muscle to show for it (of course, I can only speak for myself. It’s days later now and Sherpa still seems just fine). My heart over flowed with gratitude as sweet neighbors came out and offered to help us, sweeping up the streets and providing tape and plastic for my window. Not only did all of these wonderful people come to our aid and we were unharmed, but I also was able to drive home! As I left, I had just as much love and peace in my heart as I did before the accident.

It’s amazing how just our state of mind can filter a situation like that. I could have been mad about missing my turn, having to go the long way, getting hit by a car and not having my car to drive for some time while it’s being repaired, and extremely POed that the city of Portland and its systems are crap (which I actually was initially, but it was kind of in an amused way- the city of Portland is truly failing it’s people in some big ways and for some reason this feels comical to me). Overall, I didn’t allow myself to be negatively affected by the whole thing.

I got home feeling great and set out to brainstorm on a tarot deck I’m wanting to design. I drew and wrote. I snuggled my sweet and miraculously healthy and happy puppy. I woke up in the morning and continued dreaming and working and living into the life of my creation. I watched my dog prance around the backyard with gusto like we weren’t just totally plowed into the night before, and I moved through the day in a body that felt wonderful. What the heck is that about.

Today, like everyday, is a profound opportunity to live into the life of our dreams. In every moment we have the opportunity to take actions to develop ourselves into the best possible version of who we are; joyous, loving, kind, compassionate, inspired, passionate, authentic, etc. Feel it, laugh through it, dance into it! The power to create your reality is as simple as mastering your emotions and thoughts. It takes work, there will be tears and frustration and sadness and anger along the way, but eventually we find ourselves embodying the person we’ve always wanted to be.

This time period is an absolute acceleration of the embodiment of our soul path, for those who have chosen this journey. Closing out 2019, pay attention to what is surfacing and how you react to those bits of information as they hit your conscious awareness. Stay curious and give gratitude that they’re there- they won’t be there forever.

Everything comes and goes to teach certain lessons, and ultimately to give us new and regular opportunities to heal ourselves. It’s all in place to help you to become stronger, wiser, and more capable. Take advantage of it! Choose growth! ❤